Because I like to 1) flout convention and 2) live in the past, I thought it’d be appropriate to do my Halloween bit here now, nearly a week late.

This year, while trick-or-treating with my kids and noticing the many older kids trying to cash in, I started to wonder at what age trick-or-treating becomes unacceptable and creepy. Can you still do it at 18? Maybe, if you don’t have a beard. But how about 34? It all reminds me of a Mitch Hedberg joke about how adults aren’t supposed to go down slides, so if you find yourself at the top of one, you have to act like you got there accidentally. How’d I get up here, dammit? Oh well, I guess I have to go down. Whee!